ಮನಕ್ಕೆ ನೆನಹಾಗಿ...

A few things that unsettled me for a while over the last couple of months, in reverse chronological order of their completion:

1. The English Patient by Michael Ondaatje
2. Some new ideas that I got during the weekend based on which I can position my thesis
2. The chapter on Information and Economy in Prof's yet to be published book
3. Purushottama (a Kannada novel) by Yeshawant Chittal

All of these did unsettle me. However, only for a while. Hardly anything happens these days that unsettles me for too long. Not that I have never experienced things that have unsettled me beyond belief, and still manage to do when I think about them. There are a lot of them. But hardly any these days.

Does that mean I am caring less? Or does that mean I have grown to be more mature and more philosophical?

Or does that mean the "quality" and "quantity" of "inputs" I am getting from life is inadequate? ... Well.. a scary thought! Because some of those "inputs" that still manage to unsettle me are not happy ones.
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We all have such huge desires, such huge egos. We have our own ideas, principles, arguments. We have our PhD theses, short stories, books. We have cars, insurance policies, electric razors. We fight for our ideas, theses, razors. Acquire more, acquire better.

And to think of it, we are so very insignificant. We are as insignificant as a dead cockroach. We are as dumb as a dirty door mat. But do we realise it? (See... even after saying all this I hope that you will click on that URL and see one of my old posts. Heh. And you will. You are as dumb as the door mat at your place.)
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Not that this a "new truth" that I found. Nor is it that I realised all this just now.
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What was the point of this post beside showing off that I can read and write, and that I read, and that I can sound philosophical? Nothing. But that in itself is a proof of futility. Read as many novels as you want, write as many papers as you want, shave as many times as you want with your brand new electric razor. But you still are a door mat.
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I have an amazing capability of contradicting myself.
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For those irritated door mats who have reached till this point(lessness) - All said and done, IML, IMB, and IMT. And if you WYT reading this post, ISPY. Thanks a lot. Have a good day, and don't worry. The world is much bigger than you ever can imagine; so, every door mat has a place.